Having at present time lived in the Netherlands for over two months, I realise now that a week or two of holiday does not really afford you anything resembling an authentic cultural baptism when you visit a new country. There simply isn’t enough time to establish whether what novel thing you experienced was a part of the fabric of your host culture, or whether it was equally unlikely to have happened there as it was your home. Eliane and I now find ourselves regularly laughing at near identical experiences we’ve shared, independently from one another, in which something unexpected takes place yet everyone else in the vicinity treats it as a completely unnotable occurrence. On holiday together you typically do most things together, so if something surprising happens, then you can’t easily extrapolate and say, this is how things are here. However, here, Eliane and I spend the majority of our days with different subsets of people from the same culture, so when you notice and unexpected pattern, and realise when comparing notes that it wasn’t just you, it’s 1) pretty hilarious, and 2) cool to realise that you’ve perhaps just uncovered a hidden gem of another culture.
Having said all that I will not be pressed for good examples which i’m sure I’ll struggle to come up with… but here goes
The tartan cups are utterly confusing, but ubiquitous. They seem to be the standard issue, hosting-an-event-with-an-urn-of-coffee-and-need-to-water-a-lot-of-guests, takeway cup. On that topic it’s probably also notable to say that coffee is provided for you in many more locations than I’m accustomed to. In the supermarket is a surprising one, during the service in church (and at the end), at receptions in a waiting room like the GP’s or the city hall, at a gardening centre!? A majority of these localities will provide you a coffee in a cup identical to the one pictured with Ariana above.
Reuben and Eliane noticed this one, that when a Dutch person is asking if you like the thing they have provided you with to eat / drink, they will say ‘Lekker?’ [en:Tasty?] whilst gesturing two or three times with one hand next to an ear in the sort of motion as to shake a palm-sized piggy bank back and forth to hear if it has any coins in it. They both have independantly noticed this a number of times in a variety of settings.
The frequency of handshaking is off-the-charts. If I haven’t seen someone for more than a day i’m likely to have to shake their hand. Was it not the Dutch Prime Minister who famously shook the hand of the next speaker at a news conference immediately after having explained to his constituents that COVID measures would be coming into place with immediate effect and it would be elbow bumps only from that point onward. Yeah, well that tracks.
People speak very, very freely about their health issues. (Maybe this isn’t a case of the Dutch being the exception to the rule, as much as it is that Brits just keep everything stuffed down inside and share no vulnerability except in the closest of company.) ‘Apologies for missing the meeting last week, I wasn’t in the office’ honestly is completely sufficient. However more and more I am becoming accustomed to the normality here of someone saying ‘I wasn’t able to attend last weeks meeting because I’ve had terrible stomach problems since catching this flu. I had thought my difficulty in breathing was because of my deviated septum but actually it was more likely a blocked nose from a bug which i suspect I caught from one of my children, remember I told you they recently had explosive diarrhea’. This is not verbatim… but it’s the vibe.
Finally we’ve both noticed that, to communicate flippancy in some way, some Dutch people will shrug with an accompanying ‘pppp’ raspberry noise at the end of the sentence. Hard to explain but its like this:
I took Reuben along to his first proper swimming lesson yesterday. The lesson is all in Dutch, and he looked to be probably the 2nd oldest of the group of 6 learners. He did well. He probably could have paid more attention, but I was happy with his effort. The teacher says he needs to try not to curl his legs up underneath himself when he front crawls / breast strokes. It’s just a bad habit he’ll need to kick 😜
The parents sit at the pool side during the lesson so I got to watch the lesson up close which was really nice, as previously in his Scottish lessons it was actually pretty difficult to see what was going on, and you were behind glass so you couldn’t hear what the instructor was telling them to measure how well your kid was actually paying attention.
When the lesson finished I stood up to leave and my Earpods fell from my lap, bounced on the tiles, opened up springing both earpods away from one another, and then all three elements landed in the pool and sank immediately to the bottom. The nearest instructor did not speak English, and my Dutch tuition to this point has not furnished me with the requisite linguistic skills to aptly describe such a situation. We managed. They still work surprising!
We went to the bakery on the way home to pick up some of the good stuff. Mmmm.
Ariana and I fell into an Appeltaart coma soon after
Felix starts at the Gastouder tomorrow! He’ll be in on Mondays and Thursdays. Also on Friday we go up to Kijkduin for a weeks holiday with Els side of the family. Both Felix and Reubens were much in need of a haircut, and these two upcoming events seemed like an appropriate trigger. As it was very foul weather yesterday and we weren’t going to get out for leisure, I decided we’d go out for business and find somewhere to get their hair cut.
El stayed back at the house with Ariana whilst the boys got in the Bakfiets and fought the elements. First place I went were fully booked, second place was unexplainably closed and the third was very busy, fairly expensive but open and offered the services I was after in an acceptable time frame. I think they did quite a good job. They should call this haircut ‘The-typical-dutch-infant’
On Wednesday just past Felix had a first appointment at the ‘Consultatie bureau’ [en:Health visitor] and saw the ‘Kinderarts’ [en:pediatrician] at the same time. It was a standard appointment which they like to set up to ascertain a kids health and wellbeing once they’ve been registered. Ariana and Reuben will have one soon too. They described Felix as a vrolijke jongen [en:cheerful boy] in their notes, not before updating his vaccinations in both arms simultaneously. He was less cheerful after that. Did sleep well though.
El was advised to continue speaking primarily English with Felix. This is to help continue the development of his first language English. That was surprising to me but apparently the foundations of his first language are really important constructs on which to build a second language. However they said that organically Dutch will filter more and more into our home and that’s ok. He’s likely to learn a large portion of his Dutch with the Gastouder, with friends he makes and just generally out and about over the next few years.
Ariana actually counted to ten in Dutch for me spontaneously yesterday, which I was very impressed by. She tended to miss drie [en:three] each time, but nevertheless, nothing will stop the girl from learning. She’s a strident character at times. When I collected her from school a few days back, she left the school building accompanied by her teacher, Ariana carrying her coat under her arms, marching out with a stern look on her face. It is worth adding that all the other kids had their coats on, and it was bloody freezing outside. The teacher rolled her eyes at me and said something to the effect of, she is a very strong minded girl who will go far in life.
Ariana has very, very strong opinions about what clothes she will wear. Strong, and rapidly vacillating. We can agree, and layout an outfit for the following day which she will outright reject no sooner that laying eyes upon it the following morning. No negotiation, no being convinced. She will not wear it. She will insist on choosing something else, typically from a subset of preferred items which consist of less than 5% of her full wardrobe. You choose your battles, but it does get to a point where you just despair at how little you are able to guide her. She has a right little temper, and it’s quite hard to get her out of a strop once she’s flipped the table, metaphorically speaking… although a little bit literally speaking also perhaps.
Anyway, her dutch counting was very impressive. Reubens Dutch is really amazing too. He is not so much saying things in full sentences at this point, but he knows what the Dutch equivalent word is for many many nouns, verbs and adjectives. Also, I am still amazed when I hear Eliane chatting away in Dutch. It’s like a superpower I’ve always known she had, but only now I see her wield it to great effect, regularly. She was just chatting away with an elderly lady at the park today while me and the kids climbed on things. It’s amazing to see the family develop this together. I’ve finally sorted out my application for the language training my work offered to provide. I will start 15 weeks of classroom based dutch lessons in Veldhoven in June. Can’t wait!
Today was sunny in the afternoon. We took the kids out the park.
I chose to travel by four wheels rather than two, or three (i.e. bakfiets) It was very very good fun. Felt a little bit like snowboarding.
Here’s another few bits and pieces
Lovely family images. Felix’s haircut is very impressive, he looks completely different from earlier. You didn’t show Reuben after the event. Ariana’s dancing continues to entertain. I love the bow at the end.
Excellent looking apple pie with cream. I look forward to that, plus the breads in the baker’s shop.
Keep the images coming
Love Dad
Reuben was not happy with his haircut and as a result was not keen to be photographed despite my polite request. His haircut was great though, but he just wanted a mop top
I loved Ariana’s dancing especially her bow. Very impressive. Not so sure about Felix hair cut he looks much more grown up. I’m glad things are going well for you all. I think it was hard going for El to cycle. Pushing the 2 in the carrier one on the back and pull you on your skateboard. Can’t wait to see you all in June. Hope you enjoy your break with family in the next week or so. I’m going the Whitley Bay, then Eyemouth nr Berwick next week for a few days. I’ll meet up with John and Suefor a walk. Dad is going North to see to his both and attend some boring AGM. Keep blogging dad and I look forward to reading them and seeing the videos. Xx
Ariana loves to do a bow at the end of a performance. She’s an expressive girl
I’ve just watched Ariana’s dance routine again. She is the most endearing little girl. It would melt the heart of the hardest tyrant imaginable. Of course we only get to see the enchanting bits !!
Miss you all
Love Dad
Oh she has her moments, but trust me, she can be quite diabolical if caught at the wrong moment
Aw loved reading this! Felixs haircut looks so cute 😍 and great to hear Reuben and Ariana are doing amazing in their Dutch 🎉 we miss you all! Xx
What was the song Ariana was dancing to?
Now that I do not know 😂 maybe El can say